New start
by Mack333
Summary: Own try at a sarah dessen type of book. tell me what you think


My Story

Its my third time starting at a new school since my parents divorced. This time my mom says its the last but me and my brother know better, she also said that we would make friends fast. But like every other thing that comes out of her mouth she was wrong. Its not that I can't find anyone to be friends with its just that I don't want to. All my friends, ex-boyfriends, and my beloved past schools are the only things I want to be with right now. Well not the exs but I kind of miss my last one, Jake, why would he ever think he could get away with cheating on me, and with one of my good friends! Well I guess we were going our separate ways though anyways but I never thought he'd do that. Even if I were going to dump him-

Something hard hit me interrupting my train of thought.

"Hi, I'm Zack, and this is Lindsey, Cammie, and Tyler. You're new right?", He had a low voice and was wearing a neon shirt with pink letter saying score on it, but he was kind of cute. He had a girl holding on to him by the arm the way parents do with their children, protecting her like I was a crazy dog, and a boy and girl talking to themselves beside her.

"Ya I am, nice to meet you. I'm Abigail", for some reason my voice sounded rushed and hoarse. The girl on Zack's arm started to snicker.

"Ya nice to meet you too, where are you from? I haven't seen you before." She sounded a bit snotty and started to snicker again but this time she wasn't alone. She had blond straight hair, she was wearing skin tight clothing, and way to much make-up for school. She had on a necklace that said Cammie, which now I thought did not fit her at all. She's at least great at first impressions.

"I'm from New York, have you heard of it?" By the way I don't have an accent at all. I know it was mean to say but before I could think I was already blurting it out. Ugh another school, but same old kids. From where I was you could see all the different cliques. There were the jocks, goths, brainicas, average kids, where last year at this time I would have been well for half the year, until I got a reputation, and the other half I would have been one of the popular kids. I was only there for twenty minutes and I already knew who was in each group. High schools so predictable. A laugh brought me back to reality. "Oh hi sorry, going to take a seat", and with that I walked away.

Clearly no ones done that to them before since they just stood there for a good four seconds before turning around and walking away. I sat at the end of the fifth row waiting for a about another ten minutes. Lucas was a very odd school, but the classes went by fast , thank goodness. Lunch wasn't much different since I only talked to four kids all morning I sat alone against a wall, well not exactly alone they're was a couple at the very end listening to the guys ipod. But that was it. The rest of the day went by the same, classes were like every other schools and the students were the same too. Just great, different school, same feeling-

For the second time today something hit me. Ugh this school will probably be the one with the busiest hallways, there's something new. I looked up and there again was Zack.

"Don't you ever watch where your going? Honestly twice in one day." My voice again didn't sound like my own, this time it sounded well pissed, which I guess I was.

"Haha why don't you watch out. So how's your first day on a scale of one to ten", Zack's spirits were high for some reason and he was smiling way to much for my liking.

"Um can you stop smiling like that your kind of creeping me out." As I said this he just smiled even more.

"Why? It's just a smile, and your avoiding my question. Was it really good that you just can't express yourself?" He was being sarcastic.

"You're kidding right? Today was horrible. First I meet you and your friends, and well your girlfriends kind of rude, and then it just so happens that its the worlds longest day ever." Which it wasn't but I wanted this conversation to be over with so I just said whatever came to mind, and I had physics last period, which happened o be really long. "So no it was not good, and if you don't mind I would like to leave now. Wait why am I telling you this" I started walking to my car, and he followed. Whats wrong with him. I just want to go home!

"First off she's not my girlfriend and second I don't know why your telling me this. But I like talking to you." He sounded upbeat again, ugh. My face was showing almost fully how pissed off I was right now. "Hahaha nice face. Oops that not what I meant. Sorry"

"Um okay, wont your 'friend' get mad at you for talking to me? So I'm just going to go now I think she's coming to get you. Bye", finally he didn't follow he just looked over his shoulder to Cammie but one thing that disturbed me about this his smile faded.

When I got home, my brother and mother were waiting for me. Ugh why couldn't I be like any other teenager and just go straight to my room! Why did I need the welcome wagon?

"Hi honey, how was your first day at Lucas? Did you make friends?" My mom was your average mom. She has black wavy hair, is average height, and she's a chief which meant we never ordered in, not even pizza.

"Mom my day was like all the others. I didn't make friends, well there's this one guy, but he's more like a stalker then a friend." She just looked at me with a worried expression, that all moms have, on her face. "Oh mom it was just a metaphor he doesn't really stalk me."

And with that her expression went back to normal. "Oh okay then", and she was off into the kitchen.

"So Liam how was your day? Any friends? Classes okay?" These were are usual topics with my brother, since we transferred so much. My brother was the exact opposite from me, he doesn't hate school but he doesn't make good grades either. Oh and he's very social he could have friends in less then 10 seconds after meeting them. He is popular, which I was too at my old school, but he's two years younger. He has brown curls, blue eyes and is very tall, I think 5"11.

"It was fine. Same old same old. Met with the principal already. She's okay, doesn't understand me but it's only the first day she will by the end of the year. So whats with that guy?" Oh ya he also doesn't follow the rules either.

"He's no one don't worry we won't even talk tomorrow, one of those guys who always talk to the newbes as jokes. Ugh, all they want to do is make you feel fine and then ruin it. Oh and theres this girl who already hates me. So yup same old same old." To be honest this is usually what happens, he gets sent to the principle, and I already have people that hate me.

"Yup same old, same old. And by the way that guy probably wants you, to bad he's not your type. He won't fit into any of your criteria. Oh and I bet that he isn't a good student either, he's never going to make it." He was all the way up the stairs by now and going into his room when he said "Or maybe he's perfect for you", and with that he was gone.

Chapter 2

The next morning was like every other morning in my house. We all woke up went down stairs and ate breakfast together, then we were all off. I got in my car with my brother on the passengers side, since Liam wasn't old enough to drive yet I had to drive him. Then we were off down the driveway, down the street, and to our school. This was no different either the whole ride there we didn't talk just sat there in silence. It was a good twenty minute drive to Lucas, and we passed through the main town, and then we passed another school. In a town like this I couldn't believe there were two school. Then we were there. Before I knew it Liam was out the door and with some friends. I was looking for a parking spot when I spotted some girls getting into a fight, I guess thats normal here, ugh why did we move. After looking for a while I found one, it was close to the building I was going to and it was a really big space. I got out started walking only to hear someone calling my name.

"Abigail, Abigail!" The voice sounded familiar but it wasn't my brothers, so I turned around only to be disappointed. Ugh it was Zack again why can't he just leave me alone. "Hi, so how are you today? What class do you have first?"

"Hi, I'm fine, and I have English lit. Please don't tell me you have that too." Why was he following me! Wasn't the wagon supposed to finish after day one?

"Well I do have english lit, so I am sorry to disappoint you. Would you like to walk together?" Zacks voice sounded different today, like he was trying to hide that he was upset. It sounded strained, and unhappy. So before I knew it I was nodding my head. "Great then lets go." And with that he took my hand and he was pulling me through the crowd towards the building.

English class was no different then it was the day before, except today I had someone to talk to he made me feel good and well safe even though I just met him. Zack sat beside me the whole class, and kept looking over at me. He made me feel weird, which didn't help since a plethora of people were staring at the both of us. Why? Yesterday no one even looked at me! Ugh now that I'm sitting with this complete stranger whos being nice to me, I'm worth their time of day!

The bell rang and then Zack was standing in front of my desk.

" So what class do you have next? Did you enjoy the chapter?" Why was Zack being so nice, he hardly even knew me, ugh I should just stand up and leave. Thats it. He probably won't even notice I'm gone.

"Um math, but I have to use the bathroom" he smiled at that comment which made my face flush. So I started for the door and down the hall with my bag in hand, determined to get to the bathroom for some time to think. The same thing happened when I was walking everyone kept on looking at me and talking too. It was my second day how could I already have people talking, maybe its good comments. Thats when I heard one "Ya I know she's such a slut, how could she steal Cammies boyfriend, Zack is so messing with her right?" Thats what they thought really. Ugh! How do I get them to stop talking about me! What would I have done back in NY? Thats it.

When I got back out from the bathroom, I decided that my plan would just give me a bad reputation which I would probably get soon enough so I just decided that maybe I'll use it later, and now I'd just ignore Zack and not bump into him. And with that I finished my day not seeing Zack once, which made me feel a bit bad, he was just trying to be nice right? Stop thinking about him he doesn't fit into your criteria, and it's almost winter break meaning that we'd have to be over by that time. And anyways I don't even know him. And with that the last bell rang and I went outside and into my car, so ready to go home. Then I remembered something I need to get Liam. Where was he? I was almost to my car when I saw a fight going on. Who gets into a fight on the second day of school. When I got closer I realized that it was Liam. Wow thats just great. What did he get himself into, now I have to go stop it, which isn't the first time!

"Hey stop fighting!" I knew this wouldn't help but it is first instinct. "Please stop, Liam can we please go?"

"Oh pretty boy is this your sister coming to the rescue?" Who was this kid! Why was he so confident. I guess I was just in a really bad mood, so when he tried to punch my brother and missed I lunged in and tried to get him to stop. But then all I could remember was falling to the ground with a thunk and thinking it was Liam and thats when it went black.

Chapter 3

"Where am I?" I tried to say that but my voice wouldn't work. I tried again. "What the hell happened?" And then I heard a snicker.

"You got punched thats whats happened." I knew this voice but from where? Where was Liam? The voice replied to my unasked question. "Liam's with your mom, your in the hospital." Wow it was that bad of a hit. Shit, I got punched? Why didn't I defend myself? Why hadn't I stopped it? Ugh why was I acting so weak? I tried to get up but someones hand pushed me back down. "Doc said you shouldn't get up right away. You took a pretty bad punch right in the head. You're brave you know that? Well braver then the rest of the girls at our school." Why wouldn't he let me get up?

"Um can I get up now. I have to get home. Did my brother get hurt? Is he here also? Oh shit my mom! Where is she? She's going to be pissed!" Well she probably won't be as pissed as she was when I came home at 5 a.m. from a party, which was not good, plus I drank way to much.

"She's outside, Your brother is not hurt wasn't even touched, once he hit you and you fell to the ground he ran. Haha you showed him." With that he lifted his hand, and I noticed it was Zack. Ugh every time I try and get away from him he keeps coming back.

"Why are you here? How did you know I was here? And why are you with me and my mom and brother are outside?" It was all kind of odd for me but being in a bed with a guy next to me I could handle but being in a hospital with a guy next to me felt odd. And also why was he here? Why was he smiling at me? "Also who changed me?" It was the first thing I noticed, I usually check if I have my pants on then top which in this case I couldn't find. What was there, was a hospital robe. Oh thats when I remembered the last time I saw a robe it was on my older brother, right before he passed away. I started hyperventilating. I have to get out of here. I understood why my mom and brother weren't here. I stood up and ran for the door. I was almost there when Zack brought me back.

"You probably should lie down. I'm helping out at the hospital, and since I saw you get hit I told your brother I'd take you so he wouldn't have to. I told him to call your mom, and he was more then happy, almost relieved when I went to the car. As for your mom and brother they wouldn't came in, your mom was crying, and your brother was trying to comfort her. I didn't change you the nurse did. And can I ask you a question," he took a breath then added, "why did you want to leave the room?"

Why couldn't he be normal and just not ask me questions. Now I have to answer. Great. "I don't like being in hospitals, the last times haven't been good," I knew I was about to cry, or just yell at how mad I was that day when my brother passed. "Thanks and bye" With that I left him behind in my hospital room.

When I found my family they were in the waiting room as pale as ghosts. I wondered how I looked. I changed back into my clothes and was ready to go when a hand came on my shoulder and pulled me back around a corner. What was going on? Weren't hospitals supposed to be safe?

"Why did you run out of the room? Why haven't you said a word to me after english?" Zack, why couldn't he just leave me a lone, I mean we hardly knew each other. I knew he was just trying to help, but didn't he get it I didn't need his help. I didn't need anyones help.

"Oh um, I um, didn't want to bother you, and I got busy with things to do all day. Um, why are you still here?" I didn't know how to answer his first question, I couldn't. I have to be strong so I took a deep breath and then continued. "I have to go check on my family, please let go of my shoulder."

"Oh, ya um sorry." And with that he let go and started walking towards the door.

I followed towards the doors but couldn't find him. I guess he left. Well I better find my family and go home. They weren't hard to find. Well they kind of found me. I was walking towards a desk when they came up behind me, and scared me very much. We were in a place we couldn't handle for long so we just looked at each other and then went to the car.

The car ride home was in silence. But I wanted it craved it, I couldn't speak as all the memories of that hospital a year ago swept back into my thoughts and making it hard to breath. It startled me when my mom spoke, "How are you feeling darling?"

I wasn't sure she was asking me until I felt a nudge at my leg. I looked up to see them both staring at me.

"Oh yah. Fine", and with that the silence came back. Sweeping over and sitting there until we got home. My brother was the first one out hurrying up the stairs and into his room, my mother followed him and went into her own room. I didn't feel like going inside, and remembering my car was still at the school, I started walking.

By the time I got to the school I already had red puffy eyes and couldn't see straight. I should have just went up stairs. For a tuesday night the streets were pretty busy. Which I should probably get in my car before it got totally dark. I turned the corner and saw a book store. It was cute, it had a little fence around it, some green and purple paint and really big windows. At the bottom of one window was a little sign that read _NOW HIRING, _decided that once I got my car I'd drive back over here and apply. With this I started walking faster down the street where I saw the school and then my car.

I walked over, sat in and pushed my keys into the ignition. As it started out the parking lot I could see people still there. Probably just some teachers, better just go. And with that I was off. When I got to the book store agin I could see a women inside. I parked in front got out and opened the door. As I did this a little chime went off and the girl looked up.

"Hello, can I help you?" She didn't look much older then me, but she did dress older then she was.

"Ya you can, I was wondering if you were still hiring?" As I said this I pointed to the sign since she looked a bit confused.

"Oh ya. Yes we are. What's your name? Mines Emily." Emily had a sweet voice but she was a bit shy.

"Hi my names Abigail. NIce to meet you."

"Let me guess new transfer student?" She was opening up a little more know which was good, I think.

"Ya, I just moved here. How'd you know?"

"You look new, which isn't an insult, it's kind of a complement. Well in a way. Do you like it here?"

"Ya I do", this wasn't a lie even if it was kind of not fully true. It wasn't that I hated it either, just I guess I needed to get used to it. "It's a lot different, and well I haven't really made any friends yet", I had no idea why I kept on talking I just couldn't stop it. "How long have you lived here?"

"My whole life actually, so 18 years. Trust me school gets better, and you'll like it to don't worry."

Who was this girl she was to nice to be real. She kind of reminded me of someone. I wonder who though. There was a bit of a silence as a car drove up and stopped. Someone opened the drivers side and stepped out.

"There's my ride. You start tomorrow at around 4 is that okay?" While she said this I kept my gaze stuck on the guy walking toward the door, just nodding. How was it possible that the one guy I didn't want to see was there in front of me. He raised his hand and waved.

"Hi there, so I see you've met my sister." Zack was still so nice why had I been so mean to him?

" Ya I have." I had to leave, a weird feeling was being made in my stomach. What was wrong with me.

"Wait you two have met? Zack?" While Emily said this we just stared at each other.

"Ya we have. I better go. See you both tomorrow?" I knew the question was for him but I had to get out of this place. I started walking without looking back until I got in my car and was driving only seeing the reflection of other cars passing.

When I got home my mom and brother were sleeping. I was really tired myself so I just went upstair, washed my face, brushed my teeth, and went to bed.

The next morning I woke up early, went down stairs and into our home gym, until my mom came down to make breakfast. Thats pretty much the only time we eat together, except for dinner sometimes when we are all home, but even then we all just like being alone. I can remember that all the time when we were younger that we did everything as a family, but as soon as my parents got a divorce it wasn't as much. But then when Adam passed away, we just stopped talking and then soon enough being a family. We rarely heard from my dad who was now starting a new life, with a new family. And when my mom and brother were home I didn't feel right to be there. When I was on my own with either one of them it wasn't that bad but it still wasn't perfect. So I gave up. Studying all the time going to friends anything that could take my mind off of Adam. It wasn't that I wanted to forget about him I just couldn't think of him and not cry or even scream. Some nights I would wake up in the middle of the night thinking that he was there talking to me or I just had a dream about him that day. My mom had stopped worrying about me altogether and just focusing on her job and Liam, who was hurting. They had that brotherly bond that no one could break, they did everything together, when I wasn't with Adam or Liam. They were the best of friends, and thats why when it happened he just broke down, he started failing classes getting in to trouble a lot more then usually, and thats when my mom got worried about him. After that it never mattered what I did, she didn't care, but if Liam was out all night she would send a search party for him. I understood this though, I knew that he was younger and would do stupid things in a instant but it never acquired to her that maybe I was changing too. It happened though the changing not over night but it was happening. I thought that if she didn't care that maybe neither should I. I still kept my marks, just partied a lot more, made lots of new friends with the popular crowd, and just had fun, or what I though it was. In the beginning it wasn't that much, but by the end I was used to it already. If I got into a rough patch I didn't ask for help, I only had myself, so I did it by myself. I learned how to fend on my own, learned a lot about myself, and thought most the time that Adam should be here with me, seeing how far I've come by myself. But I knew it would never happen, and when I was sad I knew better not to tell anyone and just keep it bottled up inside. It wasn't my idle way of life but it grew on me. But through it all I never once didn't think of Adam, and I never can't stop.

We never talked at breakfast me and my mom, we just waited for Liam since it was just to tense. I was never mommies little girl, and we both liked the quiet. Liam was the one who kept us together, but sometimes even he wasn't enough. Me and my mom would fight. We always have, but after Adam passed, we fought more. I could tell it hurt Liam to see this, and I did stop, but my mom just kept it coming. She would scream and if I screamed back I would disappoint Liam and Adam so I usually just sat there silent waiting until she finished or until I just had enough and walked out. It was hard, not having anyone but Liam, even though thats all I truly needed. Liam and I were close, he told me a lot and I did the same. But I never told him what really happened that night, or why my mom and I always fought, since I knew he needed both of us and not just me.

The truth is that night, was a mistake. Adam and I were going to a party, but right before my mom got mad at him. He was going to go to college the next month a few towns away and she wanted him to stay. They always fought about this, but never like this one. He was so mad, but still insisted on going. So we did. When we got there he went to his friends and I went to mine. But since he was mad he drank a few beers, thats when he got the call. He was waiting all week for a call for the college, which told him where he was staying while attending. He was told that he was just confirming that he wasn't going to this college anymore since someone other then him cancelled it. He was so sure it was my mother, and so was I, truth be told my mother never liked me and I began to do the same towards her. He got even more upset, drank a few more beers, and by the time the party was over he was well from drunk. Thinking I should get him home right away, I asked for the keys. He said no and that he wasn't going to come home with me and was just going to a friends for the night to cool off. We went back and forth for half an hour and then I went to the car, and he went with his friends. I was halfway home when I got a call saying that him and his friend got in an accident, and were at the hospital. Knowing they were drunk I asked what happened. They told me that another driver who had also been drinking hit them and they flew and hit a wall. I put down my cell, turned around and speed to the hospital. On the way I called my mom and told her that she had to come, she said no, which really pissed me off. I couldn't believe her she wouldn't come to her sons side because of some stupid fight, some mom she was. I called Liam's cell asking if he wanted to come, and then asked Jake, my boyfriend at the time to get him. But by the time they got there it was to late, I got to see Adam for only 10 minutes before he was gone. I told him I loved him and he told me he did too, he said for me to take care of Liam and to never be as stupid as he was. And then he was just gone. I cried and cried and cried and then after feeling horrible and sad, I just got so angry at my mother, and never cared about her at all after that. How could I? She was no one to me now, even though we talked rather yelled at each other I never forgave her. She was the reason he passed and she couldn't even be there with him for those last few minutes. I hated her, but then I remembered what Adam said to take care of Liam and well he stayed under her roof I would too. It was my promise to Adam and to myself.

As the last bell rang I looked for Emily wondering if maybe she was already at the book store. When I couldn't find her I started over there myself for my first day.

By the time I got there I was two minutes late. I was usually never late for my first day, but this time it felt different. I didn't like it. I wanted to get there as soon as possible. When I parked my car and made my way inside, I saw that the store was already busy. Emily was at the cash register, sadly Zack was helping costumers, and then I saw one more girl by a shelf putting some books back. Even before she turned around I knew who it was. It was hard to miss her, she was turning around about to talk to me, not realizing who I was, but she was interrupted.

"Hi your late. Here's your uniform." Emily handed me this green looking apron, which she and Cammie were wearing. "Zack will show you around, and what to do. And I'm guessing you've meet Cammie." I didn't think that Emily and Cammie would be friends but I guess I really don't know her all to well. I followed Zack. Passed Cammie, who gave me the stank eye, towards the back. The back was large and had a ton of boxes, and some tables.

"What is this place? I never knew you and Cammie worked here" I started to say more but stopped when I saw the cutest guy I've ever seen. Who was he?

"This is the storage/employes area. And for the other part you never really asked. This is Jesse, he works here to." While he said this I kept looking around trying not to keep my focus on Jesse to long. He had short black hair and blue eyes, and from the one look I caught he was wearing worn jeans and a hoodie.

"Hi, I'm Abigail." I wanted to introduce myself and not make him feel like I was a total incompetent.


End file.
